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[underachievement]

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[oorah]

red doesn't
elektra guessed

[ welp???? it's not like he fucking knows either. ]

[underachievement]

[ as weird as it is, Elektra does.... seem cool about stuff. ]

Not like he won't do his creepy heart rate monitor thing. [ which he could do to win poker too but if he feels like ~charitably throwing it she's fine exploiting his desperate loneliness. This ain't that ]

[oorah]

look
it was just a stupid idea
the guy's drunk in my kitchen talking about me taking up golfing
don't worry about it

[underachievement]

[ well now the only thing more mortifying than doing it is not doing it ]

I said I'll go.

[oorah]

[ yikes!!!! ] okay

i'll tell him

[underachievement]

[ Jess talks herself down, reasoning that Matt and/or Elektra knowing doesn't change anything. they can both keep a secret; more importantly they're individually and combined a trainwreck also. plus oh yeah she's being a hypocrite ]

It's fine. I talk about you with Trish sometimes.
I call you Jack.

[oorah]

[ jack. ] is that why she can't come to poker

if i had used a stupid name maybe elektra wouldn't have guessed. she won't tell anyone anyway.

[underachievement]

[ 50% of it anyway ] Yes. And she knows all my tells.

[oorah]

[ wait ] do i have to pretend to be jack when i meet your sister for real?

[ not if because he's thinking this is a given now that they're hanging with friends together??? whoops. he'll do it btw get him a nametag ]

[underachievement]

[ whoa there soldier man ]

I don't know. I haven't thought about it.

[oorah]

[ it's only after he gets his reply back that he realizes how presumptuous that was. it's not like jess has met his defacto brother or the adorable family he pretends to be a part of. shit, he hates reality sometimes. ]

are you thinking about it now?

[underachievement]

I just assumed you'd run into each other in the hall one of these days. [ and she wasn't looking forward to that ]

[oorah]

oh. okay. so if that happens i'm definitely jack? [ thirstyyyyyyy ]

[underachievement]

[ she types his real name first and then goes ffUCK and gets even more excited about this prospect ]

Pete is fine

[oorah]

so you broke up with jack
or did i change my name

[underachievement]

You two figure it out.
It'll give you something to talk about that's not me.

[oorah]

okay.

do you want to meet my people? [ because he hadn't thought about it either, but... like curtis would love her. they could work up to the ridiculous perfection that was the liebermans. ]

[underachievement]

As what? Your girlfriend? [ no one's actually said it yet. and technically they still haven't. ]

[oorah]

[ oh... fuck. he really did play himself, this time. he stares at his phone for several minutes. is jess his girlfriend? does she want to be? ]

would that be so bad?

[underachievement]

Not if it's just the two of us. [ telling a bunch of people about it is where the panic starts to set in ]

[oorah]

[ he feels so much relief at reading those words. he really is in trouble here, but if he just keeps ignoring it that's fine right? healthy, even. ]

i really like when it's just the two of us anyway.

[underachievement]

[ her too, on both the relief and the trouble. except Jess is certain she's the trouble ]

Good.
Me too.

[oorah]

good [ ugh seriously why does his heart always feel like it's going to explode when she says things like that. ]

it's just that you're important to me
and so are they
so it feels inevitable or something

[ the two pieces of his life he keeps trying to keep separate. it also feels cruel when sarah's like, constantly asking if he has a girlfriend and he has to keep dodging. ]

[underachievement]

[ hers feel like bubblewrap being twisted to burst, and also the bubbles are full of blood ]

That's not what feels inevitable when someone's important to me.

[oorah]

[ sigh jess sometime s he likes to play a game where they pretend they're real people thanks for ruining it for him ]

you're right
i'm sorry
it doesn't matter
i'm being dumb
also i owe you a bottle of whiskey